Going it alone - tips for the solo female traveller
Kristina Wegscheider is a world traveller who has visited all seven continents and over 50 countries, many with Gecko’s Adventures.
She is also the co-founder of Do It While You’re Young, a travel website for young women interested in travelling, working, studying and volunteering abroad:
I have been travelling extensively since I was 19 years old and I’ve taken most of those journeys by myself.
In the early years, I would tell people my plans and they would almost always say, "You’re going by yourself?" And my response was a resounding, "Yes, I am!"
While it seemed a little scary at first, I've had some of the best moments of my life travelling solo. Why so much concern from people? Well, for one, the only place in the world where I blend in is western Europe because I’m a tall blonde.
Specifically though, the destinations I chose weren’t exactly mainstream. To me, places like Tunisia, Nepal, and Ecuador have way more appeal than more traditional holiday spots.
During these independent adventures, I noticed some distinct trends in how independent female travellers are treated and how we are perceived by the citizens of the world.
Here are some home truths about travelling on your own, especially as a woman:
I’m always with him
I don’t think some parts of the world are ready for a twenty-something solo female traveller. It seems that wherever I go and whatever I do, if I am talking to a man my age or older, I am assumed to be travelling with him.
I am a frequent flyer on Delta Air Lines and usually get upgraded to first class or at least get a prime seat in the front of the cabin. Both of these areas are typically dominated by men. Often times, the flight attendant sees me chatting to my seatmate and jumps to the conclusion that we’re dating or married ("We were just talking, I swear!").
Even when I'm on an organised tour, if I'm hanging out with someone about twenty to thirty years older than me, it’s instantly assumed that I’m their child. Luckily, my fellow travellers have always had fun with this and ‘adopted’ me as their daughter.
Sometimes it works in your favour
On a flight from Atlanta to Buenos Aires, I met a group of older doctors from Louisiana who were on their annual hunting trip to southern Argentina. I was en route to Ushuaia, Argentina for my trip to Antarctica and had to change from the international terminal to the domestic terminal for my next flight.
Seeing as they were on the opposite side of town, I had planned on taking a taxi and waiting around for ten or more hours at the airport. When I mentioned this to my seatmate, one of the doctors, he mentioned that his group had a similar layover and had arranged for lunch and sightseeing during the break. They invited me to come along where I enjoyed a delicious lunch, complete with Argentinean wine, and a brief stop in Buenos Aires.
Learning not to be quite so friendly
I live in California, where it is totally normal to smile at a stranger you make eye contact with. When you’re a girl walking alone in other places of the world, you definitely do not want to do this as it could give men the wrong impression about you! I went to Jordan last year and, due to the time difference, I was up at 5am each morning - starving.
The hotel breakfast didn’t start until a few hours later and I knew there was an awesome falafel cart about ten minutes away on foot. So, I put on my conservative, yet comfortable clothing, trekked down to the falafel joint, and had my cheap and cheerful breakfast.
During my morning routine, which went on for four or five days, I never saw another woman; just a bunch of men who were, of course, staring at me. I wanted to be friendly, but also didn’t want to attract attention, so I wore my sunglasses (even though the sun was barely out) and used every muscle in my body to just act normal and not my overly friendly self.
Those, um, female issues
While we don’t want to gross out the boys here, it is evident that sometime or another during travel, ‘that time of the month’ will coincide with a girl’s travels. If you bring supplies from home, you’re usually set, but if you forget (which I did TWICE in one year) you may find yourself in some unusual and expensive predicaments.
The first experience was in Beijing, China. I had totally and completely forgotten to bring anything and I decided to visit a pharmacy where all five of the employees were female. At first I tried asking in English. No luck. Then we tried the computer. Again, no luck. Even charades didn’t work! Then, I resorted to the best, most worldly communication method ever… drawing pictures! And it worked! The second occurrence was in Venice, Italy. Of course, I had to choose a place where items were going to be marked up even more than usual because of the location.
Of course, there are some downsides
While travelling is fun and adventurous most of the time, I have also had a few experiences where being a woman travelling solo was not so desirable. On one occasion, I had the creepiest taxi driver in all of India asking me the most inappropriate questions as he drove me to my hotel in a suburb of Delhi at 2am (be sure to always book an arranged transfer through your tour operator when landing late at night!).
And, of course, there are some times when you just need someone to point you in the right direction and they’re more concerned with trying to get your phone number and meeting up with your later that night. In both of these scenarios, ignoring or deflecting comments and/or questions is usually the best method, especially if you’re in a taxi in the middle of nowhere.
Oh yes, and even if you’re not married, it is always helpful to have a story in your back pocket about your ‘husband’ who is meeting you at the hotel. While it seems so meaningless, it actually goes a long way in most countries and men usually back-off after hearing that. Get a simple, silver ‘wedding ring’ and your story is even more believable!
Got a question for Kristina? Perhaps you've got a few tips of your own to contribute. Pop a comment in the question field below, or follow Kristina on Twitter.
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i did my first solo trip last
i did my first solo trip last year 21 day camping in Africa it was fantastic but had hiccup at end when could not get connecting flight home i cried with fear at counter wont do that again did not get help from staff and was scared but im better equipped for my next solo adventure which is this year to Peru
i am 62 years young never to late to start
Oh I forgot, there was
Oh I forgot, there was another time when a man tried to take advantage of me... in a temple in Indonesia. At these times it helps if you can run fast. No use glossing over these times for those about to take off alone. You HAVE to be vigilant and for a woman, trust your gut instinct, it's usually right. It's taken me a while to develop that, as I started travelling alone at 23 and was pretty naive but then again it was in 1989 and the world was safer but as you can see, it was still essential to be vigilant. Safety in numbers is my rule now and grow eyes in the back of your head.
Hi Kristina, I have also
Hi Kristina, I have also travelled alone a lot, mostly because I seem to be able to travel more than my friends and most of them aren't into the more unusual adventure locations as I am.
You talk more to others, people include you more often, you get the last seat at a show or the last passage on a boat or the best!
Travelling alone I have met the most wonderful people and some have become life long friends. 3 downsides have been the same. Men have tried to assault me, 3 times in fact, once on a train approaching Rome, once in a youth hostel in Alaska and once in Perugia, Italy, so it's not all smooth sailing, by no means. Another time on tour in Peru, I shared a room with a selfish woman who snored, but you get that wherever you go in close quarters. You can always pay the single supplement for a night as I did and get a good night's sleep. No matter what though, travelling alone's always interesting and most of the time at the end of the day, you can do what you like when you like, for example spend hours in museums, taking multiple photos of a leaf that appeals to you, without worrying about the other person waiting for you, eat leftovers that others wouldn't dare if they knew. Just stuff like that. Happy travelling soloists!
To Ashley 20 yrs. ago, I too
To Ashley
20 yrs. ago, I too was a broke college student. Always travel with a few plastic bowls, utensils, cup.. Eat as much free breakfast at the youth hostels/cheap hotels as you can. Bring peanut butter bc many countries do not sell and if so very expensive(easy to find bread, crackers, etc.) Fruit,nuts-seeds, yogurt, cereal/milk will keep you going plus it is very healthy. Bring your own bed linen(sheet with sides sown, so you can slip
in) cheap hotels are not always so clean. Purchase second hand clothes from local thrift stores just in case your bags are stolen. It is better to look like a bum and absolutely NO NO expensive jewelry. Good luck
@Ellie - My first trips
@Ellie - My first trips abroad were studying abroad (Australia and South Africa). Even though I went alone, I was with a group so it helped make the transition to traveling without my family easier.
I started traveling solo around age 22. I would do an organized group tour with a company like Gecko's but then add on a few days before or after the trip to explore on my own. It allowed me to have the freedom to do what I wanted for a few days and then I would meet up with the group. But, even when I am with the group, I would sometimes spend an afternoon alone so I could soak in the culture, have a tea at a local cafe, do some shopping...having the balance between solo and group is most ideal for me.
When I have done a trip completely on my own, it is a little scary but I help make it a little less intimidating by booking a transfer from the airport to my first hotel/hostel (it's a nice treat to yourself after a long flight!). In Lima, Peru, I booked a Mercedes Town Car transfer for only $20 USD. Sure, a taxi would have been a few dollars but it was awesome having someone waiting for me! I also usually do an organized city tour (a 1/2 day is perfect) which helps me get my feel for the city and also lets me meet other travelers.
Hello Kristina, it is my
Hello Kristina, it is my dream to travel around the whole world. I am very into traveling, but have never traveled alone. I was just wondering, how did you manage your very first trip all by yourself? If I were you, I would've been beyond scared.
I travelled or 11 months on
I travelled or 11 months on my own just over 1.5 years ago. I had an amazing time and learned so much. I wouldn't stay in a hotel as there's less opportunity to meet a like-minded traveller more opportunity to meet people in hostels. Strike up conversations, ask about plans and you may find they're thinking of similar places to visit.
As you would on any holiday, be sensible i.e. limit walking around after dark, don't wear much jewellery, don't swing your camera around. What seems a safe place during the day can be quite different at night.
You can get a bit down when you haven't spoken to someone for a couple of days; you start wondering why you're doing it... then you start talking to someone and remember that it's a great big world out there with so many places to see, people to meet and food to eat!
@UganganxGypsy - Great tip!
@UganganxGypsy - Great tip! Hostels are wonderful for solo female travelers as you're very likely to meet other young women doing the same thing! Plus, they're budget-friendly, allow you to cook your own meals (in most cases) and give you a bit of creature comforts.
For other readers: If safety is of concern, consider getting a single room. If you opt for a shared accommodation, bring a lock (I use a bicycle lock) to tether down your suitcase, use the provider lockers if available and never ever leave your electronics out. There have been many times when my Netbook has come out to dinner with me but at least I can see where it is then!
I have found hostels the best
I have found hostels the best accommodation for this single female. They are cheaper & safer than camping alone, and they have hot showers, & kitchens to cook cheap meals in. The most interesting folks - of all ages - stay in hostels, and they usually are full of travel stories & experiences that can guide you to future adventures.
@Anonymous - Some of my
@Anonymous - Some of my favourite travel moments are the ones I had by myself. It is a little scary at first but it forces you to put yourself out there and step out of your comfort zone. Here are a few tips from my experiences:
-Get out of your hotel room. You're not going to meet people there! While you want to be safe, part of traveling is meeting new people. I have had great times at the hotel pool or restaurant since those people are also from out of town.
-Join a city tour on your first day. Yes, they're cheesy but those 1/2 or 1 day city tours allow you to get a sense of the city's layout and also meet other tourists. On a few occasions, I have met up with people from those tours for dinner that evening.
-Bring items to entertain yourself as there will be time when no one is around. Magazines, iPod, cell phone games, sketch pad and books can help you kill time.
@Gaby - Funny you ask about
@Gaby - Funny you ask about what I do because I have been trying for years to travel for work and have been extremely unsuccessful!!
If you'd like to work abroad, here are some careers to consider:
Sales
Marketing - think tradeshows, marketing events, etc
Corporate Trainer (you could start as a Training Coordinator to get into the field) - the girls who do this at my current company are going to India for a full month, all expenses paid!
I also LOVE looking at the U.S. State Department's website for Career Opportunities in foreign service, with government agencies, etc: http://www.state.gov/careers/ - they update it every few weeks
Since you're just starting college, I recommend three things:
1) Try to become fluent in a foreign language - Spanish and French are good but something more exotic could make you more marketable to employers
2) Study Abroad!! I only did a summer and wish I would have done a whole year. Starting planning right away so you can plan your course load at your home university.
3) Look for an awesome internship during one of your summers - US Gov't would give you some great contacts for post-grad opportunities but also look at multi-national companies (those with offices in multiple countries) as you can get your foot in the door early!
@Ashley and @Gaby - you'll
@Ashley and @Gaby - you'll both appreciate this article I just wrote for my blog on how to work full-time and travel: http://www.diwyy.com/new-blog/i-love-to-travel-but-i-also-love-my-paycheck/.
If you're still in school, consider getting a part-time job or finding extra ways to make money on the side. I sell everything humanly possible on eBay and Craigslist (if I sell for friends, I ask for a percentage of the profits). Here is an article on that: http://www.diwyy.com/new-blog/funding-your-travels-ebay-craigslist-amazon-oh-my/
But, in the general scheme of things, I have developed a personal budget that is focused on travel rather than day to day expenses. I keep my clothing/shoes/accessories budget to a minimum, try to plan budget-friendly outings with friends and find ways to save cash with everyday expenses. As an example, I take public transport to work a few days a week which saves me over $20/week in gasoline. It may seem insignificant but in a year that is nearly $1,000!
Consider cutting out a picture of your dream destination and taping it inside your wallet. When you're tempted to buy that new purse or shoes, you may think twice about the purchase.
I was wondering..I love
I was wondering..I love traveling and I want to travel A LOT! but I am so broke, how do you do it?
Hi Kristina, im also a cali
Hi Kristina, im also a cali girl and I've wanted to travel all my life. I haven't even started college yet but I wanted to find a job that would enable me to travel. I was wondering what you do? or if your (incredible) blog is it.
hi kristina, i think its
hi kristina,
i think its great that youve seen so much and seem so comfortable having done so. Ive always thought the idea of traveling alone would be great and its something ive always wanted to do almost identicly to julia roberts in eat pray love. My biggest concern in doing so is i feel ill get bored having noone to talk to or share some of the amazing experiences i go through with. Is there a key to fight this feeling of and/or something youve noticed works fairly universaly when trying to make friends etc in different places?
Jess- How exciting! You may
Jess-
How exciting! You may want to try sites like tripping.com and triptrotter.com to find other young women who may be able to show you around town or provide advice on where to stay, where to dine, what to do. You may even find other travelers who will be in the same area at the same time.
As for safety, Canada should be relatively safe but I would recommend practicing the same caution you would at home, especially when you're in more urban areas. Here are some tips for my blog on things to do before you leave: http://www.diwyy.com/new-blog/preventive-measures-preparing-for-a-trip-abroad/ and here are some more tips for during the trip: http://www.iwishgapyear.com/blog/2010/03/16/12-top-safety-tips-for-females-a-guestblog-by-diwyy/
Have a fantastic time!
Kristina
Hi Jess, I'll pass your
Hi Jess,
I'll pass your comment on to Kristina. I'm sure she'll have some advice for you. It's always best to ask these things, you never know what handy tips people might have! Maybe jump on Twitter or visit our Facebook page to ask the Gecko's community too - they are usually a wealth of information (links above)
Cheers,
Kellie
Hi, In the scheme of things
Hi,
In the scheme of things Canada is proberbly small fires to travel alone... but i'll ask anywayz...
i plan on going for 6 months, not really planned out...
staying with people i know, backpackers ect, and just doing what i want, when i want to.
is there anything i need to be aware of as a young female travelling alone for this period of time?
thanks for any advice given.
from aussie jess